Ha ha ha!

There's an egg and a sausage in a microwave oven, and the egg says "Gee, it's getting hot in here!" and the sausage says "ARGH! A TALKING EGG!!!"

Q: How do you know when a lawyer is lying to you?
A: His mouth moves

Q: What's in the middle of a jelly-fishes' tummy?
A: His jelly button. (Courtesy of a student at Milton Primary School)

Patient: "Doctor! Doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains!"
Doctor: "Pull yourself together, Man!"

Patient: "Doctor! Doctor! I feel like I'm always being ignored!"
Doctor: "I thought I said "Next Please!""